Head Cold

Everyone gets sick. Flu, coughs, colds. Then there is the impervious head cold. The sinus congestion, the stuffy nose, the boxes of tissues or the cheap roll of toilet paper, always handy and ready for blowing your nose or other clean up uses! The head cold never abates in its making of mucus. That soft, sticky green and white material that the body seems to over produce like some OPEC production scheme during the long hot, summers!

This past week I’ve had a head cold. It various from congestion in the morning to free and easy breathing in the afternoon. A few nights of interrupted sleep, lots of water and fluids, going to the gym and some late nights eating McDonald's ice cream with a friend has helped it except in the area of mucus. Yes, blog reader, mucus. It’s disgusting and my Western body is over producing it like a mad OPEC Sheik hell bent on flooding American with its sticky and green viscous fluid in hopes of causing a shortage of tissue paper in the vicinity of Korea! Buy your Kleenex stock now! This is not a spam fax warning!

I blow my nose, then I blow it again and again, my ears feel like I am coming up from a long dive in the ocean. The air and sound become clearer until…I blow my nose again! Wow! I’ve never had some much mucus! I must say it’s pretty disgusting, really. It’s a normal color, in case you’re worried or not, but nonetheless, the abundance is so great that I need to share with you my mucus memories from my nose membranes!

In Korea people are helpful. It’s part of their culture and when you go to a supermarket or shop, they follow you, they help you, they talk to you. It’s great only…when Palmer needs to release the mucus--he doesn’t want to be bothered. I find a quiet corner and blow my nose. But there’s so many people here! They followed me to the corner! Oh, blog reader. I just want to blow in piece. It’s not normal blowing, after all I have a head cold, but a long, drawn out drone of gooey snot that evacuates my nose in spurts of white, messy goo! Yuck. They say that sneezing mimics the human organism well; blowing my nose is a close second. I feel a gigantic release; endorphins are on a postal rage, my wet napkin filled and easily useable for a giant spit ball; my lungs heave and relax followed by a feeling of peace. But in Korea I can’t have peace or a proper release because they want to be where the action is! I just want solitude during my nose moment, really. They want to help; tissues are offered even a cup of tea. My students have impeccable timing and finish their difficult assignment just when I am in the middle of my first nose evacuation. I turn my back; they turn with me. “Teacher, I’m finished” they yell. “great, great,” I say, “please sit down, I am trying to blow my nose!.” They make little comments, as they should, they run away, as they should. Snot is a messy clean up production!

Today’s snot report is fair to midland. It’s good. I don’t feel sick. Mucus is normal but a lot. After a bike ride to my job, it is really a fun event when I rush to the supply room with a half a roll of toilet paper and let it go! You could me say the occasional, “that’s disgusting” or “wow, that’s amazing” coming from deep in the supply room. The part time grandmother, our lunch lady who fixes the kids lunches, rushes in for my status and well being. “I’m okay,” I tell her. She walks away disappointed or something. I hurt her feelings, possibly.